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When People Rub You the Wrong Way
by Steve May
Text: Colossians 3:12-17
Topic: How to get along with difficult people
Big Idea: God wants us to live together in unity.
Keywords: Conflict; Relationships;
Introduction:
- Scripture makes it plain that God places tremendous value on unity.
- The ability to get along with others requires a great deal of effort.
- Illustration: May tells the story of Dallas Cowboy coach Jimmy Johnson being fired after winning two Super Bowls to illustrate how conflict can thrive, even when circumstances are good.
- Big Idea: God wants us to live together in unity.
Take the high road.
- Colossians 3:12
- Paul reminds us of who we are—God’s people, dearly loved by him, and expected to live holy lives.
- Illustration: May compares conflicts between two famous musicians (who chose petty insults) and two famous athletes (who chose to reconcile) to demonstrate how graciousness is a better solution.
- Taking the high road is a lot easier to do when you remember that you’re not perfect either.
- Colossians 3:14
- Illustration: May illustrates the value of humility in reconciling relationships by telling the story of a married couple he counseled, where May asked the husband, “How did you contribute to the problems?” until the husband realized he couldn’t hold a grudge against his wife when he was just as much to blame.
- You are one of God’s people; let your actions show it.
Your actions are more important than your feelings.
- Colossians 3:12
- Your feelings may be sending you in one direction emotionally, but you can clothe yourself with attitudes and behavior that move you in the right direction.
- If you feel dislike for another person, and you show them kindness, you’re not being hypocritical, you’re being holy.
Include Christ in every conversation.
- If you’re having a conversation with someone and angry words are about to be exchanged, ask yourself, “What would Jesus say right now?”
- Even if it’s true, even if he deserves it, even if it is presented in the form of a prayer request—if you say something critical about someone who isn’t there, you are gossiping.
- Colossians 3:16
Pursue personal peace.
- People who constantly stir up tension in relationships do it because they have no peace within themselves; and people who have peace have no desire to stir things up.
- Colossians 3:15
- If you have not personally experienced the peace of God which passes all understanding, then it’s no wonder that your relationships are rocky.
- Peace is the fruit of—the result of being filled with—the Holy Spirit.
Conclusion:
- Getting along with others may not always be easy, but it’s possible.
- Let the peace of Christ rule in your heart, and people will less likely rub you the wrong way.
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